FRSO: two of them?  What the fuck?

Part of the Imperial Diss List.

I am the Emperor, I diss each socialist group one at a time.  Unconditionally surrender if you want mercy.

~

This time I am attacking FRSO.  Freedom Road Socialist Organization.  Which one?  Both at once.  No, you don’t get separate treatment, because this is what you idiots deserve.

First, I’ve always enjoyed that it’s pronounced “frizzo.”

That’s honestly more important than anything.

I know barely anything about these assholes, which means they’re probably unimportant, which is honestly the biggest fucking insult of all.  How dare you have an ENORMOUS NAME like FREEDOM ROAD, identify with a cause as enormous as SOCIALISM, and then waste my time by being like, not even a thing.

They’re split in two, apparently some kind of hard “anti-revisionist” one which is hard Stalinist pro-USSR maybe Maoist, and another which went Social Democrat with the fall of the USSR, like possibly to the point of supporting the Democratic Party but I’m not sure.

I’ve heard them described as “Frizzo Hard” and “Frizzo Soft,” or “Frizzo Fightback” or “Frizzo-the-one-with-the-website.”  I mean holy fuck what a mess can you assholes just get your shit together, what a fucking disgrace, at some point someone should just realize that it’s not worth the pride points and one of you should change the name.  Is it a couples thing?  It’s probably a couples thing, there’s probably a divorce involved in there somewhere.  Like we’re going to get to Ragnarok or the Rapture or, heavens to Betsy, possibly the insurrection, and you two are going to be holding out over the name.

Just to be clear, this entire article is going to be about your name, because that’s all people know about FRSO.  Not your political work.  Just your name.  All you’re known for is your name, and how it’s split between two organizations.  That’s the joke.  Good job.  When the revolution comes, people are going to look back and say, not “oh yeah, that’s the group that really contributed this or that to the uprising,” but “oh yeah, that’s the group that was completely irrelevant but was split in two the whole time and was fighting over the right to which side got its name.”

That is how you will be remembered.

Stare into the horror.

~

Part of the Imperial Diss List.

Okay mortals, bow before your god.  If you want the polemics to stop, message me a white flag of total surrender to the Solar Empire.

star-wars-emperor-shuttle

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